I don't know why

Two days ago I walked upstairs and followed a curious fruity smell into the bathroom.  On the floor was a pillow.  Will had ripped off the allergy case and the cloth that covered it.  So the pillow was a lumpy, cottony mess carefully covered with a bottle of apricot body wash.  He covered the apricot body wash layer with an entire package of pads that he had taken out of the plastic wrappers and had removed the backings from the adhesive.  He carefully covered the entire "pillow" with two layers of pads and discarded the plastic wrappers by the door.  The backings were left in a different pile.  When I moved one of the pads to take a closer look at the orange body wash Will ran over and fixed his art installation.

Snowmen

I was upstairs in the living room when I heard the front door open.  When it didn’t shut I got up to investigate.  William was standing under the front porch.  He was wearing Elizabeth’s straw hat over my straw hat, snow boots, underpants and carrying two handfuls of baby carrots.

“Do you want to make a snowman?”  I asked him.

“Yes.”

I brought him inside and got some clothes on him because that’s what good mothers do – they have their children actually wear clothes outside in single digit weather!  Boom!  Instant “Good Mother” right there!

Elizabeth, William and I went outside to make a snowman.

New England snow is different.  It’s usually heavy, wet, back breaking snow that freezes the next day with a nice crunchy top.  The kind of snow that turns to ice for skiing – the way nature intended!  But this snow was different!  It was powdery, even a day later and it didn’t stick to anything, even itself.  How annoying!  I tried to roll a ball – fail.  I tried to make a square with a shovel – fail. 

The first time my autistic son requests a snowman and the snow won’t cooperate?  No, it will cooperate I decided.  I went over to the mound I had shoveled off the driveway the day before.  I carefully cut out a bottom square, then topped it with two more.  We put branches in for arms, twigs for lips, ice chunks for eyes and a carrot for a nose. 

Best. Snowman. Ever.*

*Well, not really.

Will's Poetry

Will writes a lot of poetry.  Today's poem:

1.  Let us gather in we all share!
2.  Let us always in a circle care!
3.  Let us always in we all care!

My husband the plumber

I'm sure the reason my husband went to business school was because he wanted to be a plumber. So, It's worked out well for him. I conservatively estimate that he has saved us well over $700 so far this year. The reason? Oh, William + autism + a toilet + trash* = a delightful clog. My husband's new hobby is taking off toilets (aka plumbing). Impressive isn't it? I imagine he talks a lot about his hobby with his co-workers. "Oh, you like to travel?". He could ask, "I can remove a toilet in 1 minute.". I've heard that men like men with skills so I imagine everyone is impressed to hear that. * trash being anything from unwanted crumbled up paper, to sunglasses, to a rubber ball, to a McDonald's toy (Yes, that Happy Meal was totally worth it! Why do you ask?)

Keeping in Contact with my Boy

Will’s teachers set him up with an email address yesterday.  I found this in my email.

Hi mom ,

How are you?

I am at school about to play fun in a box.

I gotta go.
Sent from my iPad

So, I’ll admit to being disappointed not to get anything today.  When Will got home I found this in his draft folder.

If You Give a Mouse a Cookie!
If you give a mouse a cookie,
he's going to ask for a glass of milk.
When you give him the milk,
he'll probably ask you for a straw.
When he's finished, he'll ask for a napkin.
Then he'll want to look in a mirror
to make sure he doesn't
have a milk mustache.
When he looks into the mirror,
he might notice his hair needs a trim.
So he'll probably ask
for a pair of nail scissors.
When he's finished giving himself a trim,
he'll want a broom to sweep up.
He'll start sweeping.
He might get carried away
and sweep every room in the house.
He may even end up washing the floors as well!
When he's done,
he'll probably want to take a nap.
You'll have to fix up a little box for him
with a blanket and a pillow.
He'll crawl in,
make himself comfortable
and fluff the pillow a few times.
He'll probably ask you to read him a story.
So you'll read to him from one of your books,
and he'll ask to see the pictures.
When he looks at the pictures,
he'll get so excited he'll want to draw
one of his own. He'll ask for paper and crayons.
He'll draw a picture.
When the picture is finished,
he'll want to sign his name
with a pen.
Then he'll want to hang
his picture on your refrigerator.
Which means he'll need
Scotch tape.
He'll hang up his drawing
and stand back to look at it.
Looking at the refrigerator
will remind him that
he's thirsty.
So...
he'll ask for a glass of milk.
And chances are if he asks
for a glass of milk,
he's going to want a cookie to go with it.

Under the subject Contact.  (I don’t know why) but I made him send it to me anyway.

Allowance

We decided to start giving Will allowance so he has his own money to buy every Dr. Seuss book possible on his iPad stuff.  Ideally he will learn the value of and usefulness of money and become more empowered.  I’ve thought about the best way to do this for a while.

A couple of weeks ago I took Will with me to the store and he wanted some books.  I told him “no” because he doesn’t always get something when he goes to the store.  Apparently I’ve bought him something the last several times or he really, really wanted those Dr. Seuss books because he was upset and it took a significant amount of my strength to get him away from the book aisle.

Naturally by the time we left the store I forgot about the books but William hadn’t.  He bolted back in.  When I stopped him and he realized that he wasn’t going to get the books he started crying and sat down in a mini (though loud) temper tantrum.

The experience in the store made me realize that 1.  Will is huge.  2.  He has no control over what he gets.  3.  If I say “yes” to often it becomes an expectation that every time he asks for something he gets it.

Admittedly, I’ve said “yes” to a lot of things lately because I’m so excited that he wants something.  He didn’t want anything for years so my inclination is to say, “Oh, you want a pony?  Sure, we’ll keep it in Bri’s room.”

There Goes the Exercise Plan

I told Cheryl that if Will stopped by her house again when he was out for a walk and asked for a ride home, not to give him one.  She looked at me, her face equal parts aghast and concerned.

“… um, never mind.”  I said

She looked at me.  “And even if I wouldn’t my husband would.”  She stated flatly.

Mary, Mary

We sat down for dinner.  My husband asked Will.  “Do you want some green beans?”

“No green beans.”

“Do you want a hot dog?”

“No hotdog.”

“Do you want salad?”

“No salad.”

At this point I chimed in.  “Do you want a million dollars?”

“No million dollars.”

“Do you want a unicorn?”

“No unicorn.”

“ Do you want a pony?”

“No pony.”

“Do you want refried beans?”

“Yes refried beans.”

Watching a movie with William

I was watching Amazing Grace while folding laundry.  Will came and sat by me on the couch.  He laid down.  Got up, opened the ottoman took out his pile of blankets and laid back down on the couch.  He handed me Bri’s clothes to fold; probably because they were in his way.  Once I finished folding he pointed to my legs.  “Move, please.”  I moved my legs off the couch.  He pointed at me.  “Move please.” 

I stood up.  “Do you want me to sit on the other couch?”  I asked him.

Will pointed to what seemed like the exact spot I moved from on the couch.  I sat.  He scooted next to me and laid his head down in my lap.  Then he switched back to the other side.  He put a blanket in my lap.  Then another.  Then had me put my arms around them.  I looked at the similarly hugged pile of blankets on his lap.  We smiled at each other and I kept the blankets on my lap.

Why does he always start with an egg?

I walked into the kitchen bleary eyed.  Will was already up.  The evidence was on the counter.  He’d cracked an egg into a bowl, added soy milk and had measured out powdered sugar.  “Will, what are you making?”  I questioned.

“A cake.”  He giggled.

“Oh, no cake right now.”  I told him.

Will walked to the cupboard and pulled out a container.  He poured his mixture into the container and put it in the fridge.

… As soon as Will got off his bus that afternoon he put the container in the microwave to cook it.  So, I added flour and xantham gum and made pancakes for him.

Friday

Will was sitting on a chair in the living room eating his normal breakfast of a peanut butter waffle sandwich. "Will, are you wearing anything but peanut butter?" I asked.

Answer: No

B is for boat

Will was sitting on the couch playing with his iPad, well he was actually transcribing videos from You Tube, when I told him it was time to turn it off.  He put it down and walked down the hallway.  I saw him pick up a newspaper hat.  He put it on.  He started puttering down the hallway, holding his arms in front of him, fists closed.  “Babababababa …”  He puttered.

“Boat,” he said.

“Is he saying butt?”  One of my kids asked. 

Will puttered around the living room and hallway, driving his boat, in a newspaper hat, wearing only underwear, delightedly for a while.  While we, his adoring public, laughed.  Then Will, catching sight of his reflection in the living room windows, watched himself as well.

William's List of 101 Things He's Grateful For

Bri sat next to Will on the couch.  "Will, what are you grateful for?"  she asked.  Two days later I noticed Will had written a list of what his friend Jordan was grateful for on his iPad.


William's List
1. Thank you for food
2. Thank you for fruit
3. Thank you for food
4. Thank you for food
5. Thank you for fruit
6. And finally when it the puppy has finally she is fruit. The End.
7. Thank you for computer
8. Thank you for iPad
9. Thank you for iPad
10. Thank you for iPad
11. Thank you for iPad
12. Thank you for fruit
13. Thank you for food
14. Thank you for TV
15. Thank you for DVD
16. Thank you for iPad
17. Thank you for food
18. Thank you for TV
19. Thank you for CD
20. Thank you for iTunes
21. Thank you for iTunes
22. Thank you for TV
23. Thank you for CD
24. Thank you for TV
25. Thank you for iTunes
26. Thank you for house
27. Thank you for food
28. Thank you for fruit
29. Thank you for food
30. Thank you for food
31. Thank you for church
32. Thank you for house
33. Thank you for church
34. Thank you for TV
35. Thank you for food
36. Thank you for fruit
37. If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands
38. Thank you for TV
39. Thank you for shower food
40. Thank you for house
41. Thank you for turkey
42. Thank you for house
43. You sea our house
44. Thank you for food
45. Thank you for food
46. Do As I’m Doing
47. Thank you for music
48. Thank you for house
49. Thank you for love
50. Thank you for love
51. Thank you for love
52. Thank you for love
53. Thank you for jacob
54. Thank you for brianne
55. I’m a Little Snowflake
56. Thank you for lizzy
57. Thank you for mom
58. Thank you for dad
59. Thank you for jordan
60. Thank you for TV
61. Thank you for Zebra
62. Thank you for Zero
63. Thank you for house
64. Thank you for love
65. Thank you for love
66. Thank you for Laurie Berkner Whaddaya Think Of That?
67. Thank you for world
68. Thank you for Abc’s
69. Thank you for piano
70. ABCD Medley
71. Thank you for love
72. Thank you for teeth
73. Thank you for love
74. Thank you for kiss
75. Thank you for hug
76. Thank you for stand
77. Thank you for love
78. Thank you for roller coasters
79. Thank you for roller
80. Thank you for love
81. Thank you for love
82. Thank you for love
83. Thank you for underwear
84. Thank you for love
85. Thank you for love
86. Thank you for love
87. Thank you for name
88. Thank you for name
89. Thank you for underwear
90. Thank you for dinner
91. Thank you for kiss
92. Thank you for quiet
93. Thank you for quiet
94. Thank you for good
95. Thank you for job
96. Thank you for top
97. Thank you for love
98. Thank you for love
99. Thank you for bob
100. Thank you for job
101. I Know a Chicken


Come to think of it ... did Will just write my Christmas newsletter?  Why yes, I think he did.

Avoidance

I know I need to go to the store to pick up a couple of things and I know the longer I sit here the worse the traffic will be.  Yet, still I sit here -- avoiding it.  Sigh.  Will is sitting on a chair listening to Lori Berkner on his iPad and stimming on a Dr. Seuss book.  One of the twenty plus books I've had to "buy" from the library because he wrote on them.  He's not wearing pants.  But I doubt that surprises anyone.  Will is more stimmy than usual today because someone gave Bri sweet rolls.  Will found them and ate one.  I don't think he's stopped vocalizing since he woke up.  Will peers intently at his book, one hand twisted up by his ear and eye, the other is spread out, two fingers bent in while the others are straight.  He bangs his knuckles on the books then brings it up the side of his head.  His fingers shake with intensity.  "Eeeeee," he croons as he stares, becoming increasingly wrapped up in his world and ignores us.  I hear an occasional slap.  He hits his right shoulder with the side of his hand then moves it up to rub his forehead. "Eahhhh."

Will, Interrupted

Will was sitting on the couch typing on his iPad while listening to music. “Will,” I said. “We're getting a kitty.”

Will looked up.  Then he reached over and pinched me, “No kitty!”

Then Bri said, "William, Brianne's getting a cat."

Will smiled, "Cat -- meow."

Love Notes

I wrote a note to Will.  “I love you!  You are funny and cute.  You are a good boy.”

He read it, then grabbed my hand.  “Capital I.”  He directed.  “Lowercase l, lowercase o . . .”  I read, “I love you.  You happy.  You radicsh.”  

I told him that radish didn’t need the “c.”  Then I paused . . . completely unsure as to why he was calling me a radish.

Church

Today at church one of the speakers said that his favorite part of church was listening to hear what song William decided to sing. When I talked to him after church he asked if Will ever had play dates because he wanted his “kids to get to know Will and Will to get to know his kids.” I demurred from the play date because I thought it would be disappointing for them. Will would probably spend the whole time watching the previews on a DVD. But isn’t it great that he asked! So many people are intimidated by special needs that it’s always a pleasant surprise to meet someone who is not.

Pants are Optional

Will doesn’t like to wear clothes.  I don’t know why.  Maybe they’re uncomfortable, or binding, or not the right name brand.  For years he’d only wear a diaper or underwear and strip every time I dared put a shirt or pants on him.  He also liked to run away.  And often those two activities would intercept.  

Shortly after we moved into our current house, I was sitting at the computer when I heard the front door shut.  I casually looked out a window to see a half naked cherub running barefoot across the lawn.  I ran downstairs.  Though it was November I didn’t stop to put on shoes.  I ran out the door.  Will was wearing a tee-shirt and a pair of underpants turned around and running down the middle of the street.  I started chasing him.

I was slowly gaining on him.  We ran past a landscaping crew raking leaves.  Their heads turned, watching us run past.  A pick-up truck pulled alongside me.  The man rolled down his window, keeping up with me while barely pressing on the gas.  “Is everything alright?”  He asked.

Panting, I thought, “I’m chasing a pantless, coatless, shoeless, sockless autistic cherub who is running down the middle of the street.”  “No, I’m fine.”  I assured him.  Then putting a frantic burst of speed I caught hold of Will’s tee-shirt and slowed him down.

Entrance: Denied

It’s some weird autistic thing.  Will has decided that no one can open the cabinet the TV in the playroom sits on.  We put some videos in that cabinet and the kids like to watch Book of Virtues on Sunday but Will doesn’t want them to watch that either.  I’ve seen him run in the playroom saying, “No book of virtues!” and chase the kids out of the room.  They leave because he pinches.  (They’re smart self interested that way!)

Then over a week ago Jake had the bright idea to teach Will how to play tag.  He thought how can I motivate Will to chase me?  And naturally thought of the cabinet in the playroom.  He taunted Will by touching it them tried to run out of the room before Will could pinch him.  I told him it wouldn’t end well and wasn’t a great idea, but Jake is 13.

And now no one is allowed in the playroom unless Will is distracted.  Will even tried to get me out, but mama doesn’t play that game!  And I use my “you will not pinch me” voice and say “you will not pinch me.”  And that works about half the time.

Great, another thing to fix – but on the bright side it’s not in the bathroom. 

(A la my facebook post September 1st:  William + chocolate syrup + a cream colored sofa = 1 unhappy mama; then while I was scrubbing the floor, couch and coffee table, Will stuffed a plastic bag, a tube of sunscreen and soap down the bathroom sink drain. Now I believe he is naked in the backyard. I know the question on your mind -- a cream couch woman? My only response -- well, I wanted to match Marcy.)

Will in Action

Wednesday: 

Looking up from my computer induced stupor I notice two things.  1.  It’s almost 8:00am and 2.  William’s bus is here.  Ack!  I run downstairs and notice that the front door is cracked open.  I run outside and ask the bus drivers if Will is on the bus.  They said no – which saved me from my second question … “is he wearing pants?”

I found Will in the backyard and no, he was not wearing pants.  I put some on him, added some shoes and pulled a fleece over his head.  He wandered outside while I frantically tried to make his lunch and save myself a drive.  I didn’t have enough peas in the freezer upstairs so he only got about half a cup.  Usually he gets more than a cup.

Thursday:  

I hit the snooze button on my alarm this morning because I was tired.  Thus I was ten minutes late with everything.  I was hurrying downstairs carrying two shirts for Will to choose from, a pair of socks, Will’s communication notebook, his lunch and a spoonful of applesauce topped with Will’s vitamins; when I noticed the front door was wide open!  I hurried outside.  Will had just got in the van.  He was 1. Wearing a shirt. 2. Wearing flip flops and 3. Carrying his fleece.   (He already had pants on.)